From mid-October to mid-March, I smile more than most. Things in Texas finally cool down and even better- calm down. There's something about the Texas heat that gets people all hot and bothered (literally, you filthy animals). But this.. this is my most favorite time of year. There is always something to say at the end of my sales calls- "Enjoy this great weather!"; "Happy Holidays!"; "Have a great New Year"; "Oy! Hanukkah is over already? I feel like it's only been 3 days!" Even the 4000 people in line at Old Navy on the last Saturday before XMAS were cheery. The world just has a pep in its step and I'm skipping right along, too.
But once Christmas tidings have been spread and Granny's out of eggnog, the fun is over. I will inevitably open up any social medium on December 31st, find the devil of all posts: "New Year! New Me!" and think to myself: OH SWEET FRESH-FROM-THE-VIRGIN-MARY'S-WOMB ANGEL BABY JESUS, SPARE ME.
These posts and the mindset that accompanies them poses two very poignant questions:
1. What is so bad about yourself that you feel the need to devote an entire 12 months to completely reinventing yourself?
2. If said human flaws are so horrid, so tragic that a reinvention is actually necessary... WHY are you waiting until January to start the process?
I am human, not surprising to anyone; and I am a human with flaws. Should I run more? Probably. Should I drink less? Eh. Should I not swear as often? Definitely. But those are things that I should consider all days of the year, not just at the beginning of a new one. Now, some people need set goals. Some people need lists and sticky notes and ways to track their progress- helllloooo fitbit. But to those that are desperate to start anew, I beg you to reconsider.
I remember sitting cross-legged at cabin devotional at Camp Capers one really hot summer night and talking about "worth". We talked about things we didn't like about ourselves (which at 9 years of age doesn't touch what i have to offer at 22). We talked about body image and purity of heart and mean things those stupid cootie-clad boys said about us and the difference between complacent acceptance and the true embracing of our human flaws. It may seem intense, but I think the goal was to explore that then in hopes of instilling a way to combat the issues that were bound to sneak back up later in life *not sure it worked, but A for effort*. At the end of it all, we hashed out the notion that God didn't just accept us for who we are, but loved us for it and if He could do it- if He could see, understand, respect and love us for our exact make up (big ears and all), we should work to do the same for others, and especially for ourselves.
You are a living, breathing human with a real purpose in this life. Whatever your beliefs may be, that should hold true. We are in control of adjusting our lifestyle to smooth out whatever "flaw" we think we possess, but saying and believing that the person you are in this moment is unworthy of another year breaks my heart. (And for the record, if I voted to reinvent myself in my 23rd year of life, I would feel bad for the people that put up with me for the prior 22. Like.. I should've started when I was 4 before all the real damage was done, not wait until after the storm.)
According to the second chapter of Patanjali's Yoga Sutras, there are obstacles or burdens one inevitably encounters along the spiritual path. These are called kleshas and there are five:
1. avidyā: ignorance; confusion; lack of insight
2. asmitā: self centeredness
3. rāga: belief that outer circumstances are responsible for good luck
4. dveṣa: belief that outer circumstances are responsible for unhappiness
5. abhiniveśaḥ: deep seated anxiety; fear of death
Whatever it is that has happened, whatever it is that knocked you down- it does not have to control you or define you. It can and is merely an obstacle that hit you really damn hard straight in the face. So what makes your klesha any harder or easier to handle than another's? Nothing. It's just different. So what if instead of fixating on "flaws", the broken pieces of your life, by vowing to eat less or run more or not drink 4 cups of coffee daily, we resolved to fall in love with who we are right now and only strive to improve our minds, bodies and spirits if we choose to walk a new or different path? Just because something is broken does not mean it is ruined.
Whatever it is that has happened, whatever it is that knocked you down- it does not have to control you or define you. It can and is merely an obstacle that hit you really damn hard straight in the face. So what makes your klesha any harder or easier to handle than another's? Nothing. It's just different. So what if instead of fixating on "flaws", the broken pieces of your life, by vowing to eat less or run more or not drink 4 cups of coffee daily, we resolved to fall in love with who we are right now and only strive to improve our minds, bodies and spirits if we choose to walk a new or different path? Just because something is broken does not mean it is ruined.
Your happiness is in your hands, as is your unhappiness. Do things because they add to your life, because they feed your soul- not because you think they will make you better. Because if we are being completely honest- we should question who dictates the definition of "better"? I think what the world needs is a little more compassion for the unfiltered, imperfect, true-to-form human being. The things you do, the people you surround yourself with and the thoughts you think should all fill you up with love, not remind you of the ways you "don't measure up". Maybe the reason we can't love our neighbors as ourselves...is because we, in fact, do not love ourselves.
Enjoy your life. It is a beautiful gift, in all of its brokenness, and it is yours.
Give love and gratitude everywhere you go. Happy 2015, my friends.
Give love and gratitude everywhere you go. Happy 2015, my friends.
