Once upon a time, I referenced a very old bearded man with a very wise lesson. No, not Jesus... Uncle Si. My post was about the overwhelming stupidity of twentysomethings. It is only right and honest to include myself in that genre because despite all efforts, I too am a twentysomething who makes less than lovely decisions all too often. But what I wrote about wasn't just how dumb we are 98% of the time; it was about the elusive mentality of invincibility and naivety-- too cocky to think we will ever get caught; too naive to realize we aren't exempt from the cold, harsh realities of life and relationships. These lessons suck. But I hope for your sake and my own that we get it right before it's too late.
"YOLO" made its way to popularity and on spray painted t-shirts thanks to Drake (**can be found in tank form on any drunk spring breaker. chances of seeing this are inexplicably correlated to the exponential level of douche-bagginess. #math). But "you only live once" didn't leave the impression on twentysomethings the way it should have. We should've let it sink in, focused on the big goals we have to aim for, acknowledging the way our lives affect the people in our world and how to constantly make the best choices each day so if/when life ends, we can at least say we tried. But instead, we took it as a lyrical hall pass to do whatever the hell we wanted because "life is short". But, I can't blame Drake for our idiocy. Twentysomethings are notorious to looking for anything and everything that resembles a hall pass. But that is just not how life works. You don't get to play with fire without ever getting burned.
The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn. ~David Russell
I'm not talking about deciding to drink during the Super Bowl and then knock out a situation analysis after. I'm not talking about deciding on spring break in Panama City or raging at SXSW. I'm not talking about the bullshit. I'm talking about life choices; decisions that shape your world, your future, your people.
I'm talking about your gut. If you watch NCIS, you would know that the "gut" of Jethro Gibbs is never wrong. If you knew me, you would know that my intuition is borderline creepy-accurate. I know when something is wrong. I know when people are good and when people aren't. I know when the world, "my world", is warm and safe. I just know these things. I can feel it. I can sense it. It is all-consuming and unavoidable. But I'm not psychic or perfect (kind of, sort of, not really). I have been known to ignore my gut. I don't always lead with my best foot forward. I follow emotion instead of reason. I follow my heart despite unrequited love. I leap without worrying about a safety net. But the difference is that I strive to make choices with only the best of intentions.
Can you say the same for yourself?
Life is so damn unfair. All day. Every day. The universe is a cocky SOB that says "challenge accepted" every time you think "could this get any worse?!" But there's a catch to that cliche-- the really unfair part that is we, especially twentysomethings, have a preconceived notion that it should be fair, that life should be easy, that we are being punished, not blessed, when the going gets tough. And to those who think their poop doesn't smell, to those that think unicorns exist and to those that respond "like I just can't" when life throw ya for a loop: GROW. UP.
Be sad. Be mad. Be upset. But then grow a pair and get over it. Life really is short (just ask my dad who had to bury our family dog this morning). To my fellow seniors, we have 51 days left until we walk the stage, secretly laughing because no one knows how we made it this far. We have 51 days until the world expects us to put on that suit, quit binge drinking and sign up for Match.com. ( ps- if you have been waiting for me to join the online dating world, you've got 3 years left. i ain't facing that demon until 25) But just because we have only 51 days left until graduation does not negate the reality that most of us have 8 more YEARS of being insanely selfish. Find what/where/who makes you happy and fight like hell for it.
DISCLAIMER: do not fight for the past. do not fight for the shoulda, woulda, coulda. fight for something/someone/anything that is worth your soul.
The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new. ~Socrates
The world spins on the principle of inherent tragedy. But you, any of you, and especially Gen Y-ers are MORE than capable of surviving and thriving. As RJM, my beautiful, graceful, SMART (not dumb) gazelle of a best friend, said yesterday, "Never knock the lesson, sisterfriend". If it hurts, if it's hard, if it sucks the living hell out of your soul, don't worry. Be grateful that the Big Man Upstairs thinks you are strong enough. Be grateful for the struggle- it's real but it is ALWAYS damn well worth it.
PPS- Did I mention that we graduate in 51 days? Holy shit, Batman.
