Uncle Si Knows Best

Invincible is defined as “being too powerful to be defeated or overcome” according to a simple Bing search. *Yes, I use Bing and own a PC and like to wear turtlenecks in the winter. So what? Haters gonna hate* Putting your snide judgment on my turtleneck and technology choices aside, the unfortunate reality of “invincibility” for twentysomethings is more of an epidemic than a virtue. We drive too fast, we drink too much, we eat McDonald’s chicken nuggets, and we lack, for the majority, a sense of accountability. All of these things are because we have developed this invincible mentality that shields us from the truths of the world around us and when things go a-wry, we usually never see it coming.

Being “surprised” by the people in our lives and their actions never bodes well. You feel duped, stupid, and the most heart-wrenching of all, betrayed. A best friend starts dating your ex; a classmate doesn’t pull their weight on a project worth 78% of your course grade; an idol gets beat up with his own golf clubs by his own wife. The “YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME” scream is an inevitable and reasonable reaction because these people suck and you tend to have a little sense of optimism left for mankind. But …. COME. ON. PEOPLE. There’s no way you did not see these things coming. Because if it this person looks, walks, talks, or even smells like an asshat, they’re probably an asshat. Wait, my bad… this trope usually references ducks but you catch my drift. Crappy people make crappy decisions and the less-crappy people are the ones who suffer.  And even at the ripe age of 21 and author of all this mumbo-jumbo, I should know better, too.

The “bff” will rationalize her new found love with your new found ex as “well, it just happened”; that anxious classmate that HAD to be your lab partner but never spoke two words to you in the last 2 years totally knows you’re a sucker who just wants a good grade at any cost; even killer sponsorships and a fan base of the highest caliber couldn't save poor, poor, sexually deviant Tiger Woods... because he had it coming.

My thoughts are this: stop being an invincible idiot and be smart enough about the world around you to see the ducks (and asshats) coming. Don’t spend all day watching the Kardashians. Instead, find a decent local news channel and tune in on the daily.  Put down the Cosmo and pick up the NY Times. When you enlighten and expand your vision of the world, you can actually recognize the “ducks” a little better. Once you spot a duck, take some advice for ol’ Uncle Si on Duck Dynasty: “It’s not you, it’s me? You’re damn right, heffer!”.

Everyone gets duped, but if you know the signs and open your eyes to what's really going on, I promise it won’t suck so bad.